{"version":"https://jsonfeed.org/version/1","title":"Nicety is Necessity","home_page_url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com","description":"Nicety is Necessity","author":{"name":"Nicety is Necessity"},"items":[{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-sovereignty-of-me-and-the-sanctuary-of-we","html_content":"

There is a distinct kind of quiet that comes with spending your twenties and thirties carving out your own corner of the world. By the time you reach forty, the rough edges of youth have been sanded down by life, loss, g...

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-sovereignty-of-me-and-the-sanctuary-of-we","title":"The Sovereignty of 'Me' and the Sanctuary of 'We'","summary":"There is a distinct kind of quiet that comes with spending your twenties and thirties carving out your own corner of the world. By the time you reach forty, the rough edges of youth have been sanded down by life, loss, g...","date_modified":"2026-07-09T22:55:52Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/unnecessary-weight-of-defeat-why-hope-is-a-clinical-necessity","html_content":"

A patient recently came onto our hospice census. Like so many who cross our path, she was grappling with the crushing weight of stolen autonomy. She hadn't walked in a long time, and the grief of that quiet forfeiture ha...

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/unnecessary-weight-of-defeat-why-hope-is-a-clinical-necessity","title":"Unnecessary Weight of Defeat: Why Hope is a Clinical Necessity","summary":"A patient recently came onto our hospice census. Like so many who cross our path, she was grappling with the crushing weight of stolen autonomy. She hadn't walked in a long time, and the grief of that quiet forfeiture ha...","date_modified":"2026-07-01T22:56:21Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-boy-in-the-mirror-a-letter-to-my-future-self","html_content":"

A Note from Then to Now

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-boy-in-the-mirror-a-letter-to-my-future-self","title":"The Boy in the Mirror: A Letter to My Future Self","summary":"A Note from Then to Now","date_modified":"2026-06-27T05:40:19Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-fathers-we-carry-the-fathers-we-choose","html_content":"

Father’s Day is rarely a straight line. For some, it is a simple day of gratitude and shared laughter. But for many of us, it is a landscape carved by memory, shadowed by grief, and complicated by the fragile, imperfect ...

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-fathers-we-carry-the-fathers-we-choose","title":"The Fathers We Carry, The Fathers We Choose","summary":"Father’s Day is rarely a straight line. For some, it is a simple day of gratitude and shared laughter. But for many of us, it is a landscape carved by memory, shadowed by grief, and complicated by the fragile, imperfect ...","date_modified":"2026-06-22T23:37:35Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-invisible-architect-of-the-movement","html_content":"

When we look back at the landscape of the Civil Rights Movement, our eyes naturally gravity toward the mountain peaks. We talk about Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s soaring rhetoric, Rosa Parks’ quiet defiance, and the swee...

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-invisible-architect-of-the-movement","title":"The Invisible Architect of the Movement","summary":"When we look back at the landscape of the Civil Rights Movement, our eyes naturally gravity toward the mountain peaks. We talk about Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s soaring rhetoric, Rosa Parks’ quiet defiance, and the swee...","date_modified":"2026-06-19T19:58:10Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-unmet-need-why-it%E2%80%99s-almost-never-about-you","html_content":"

We’ve all experienced a moment where someone’s behavior catches us completely off guard. Maybe it’s a sudden burst of anger from a coworker, a cutting remark from a family member, or—in my line of work—a patient opening ...

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-unmet-need-why-it%E2%80%99s-almost-never-about-you","title":"The Unmet Need: Why It’s Almost Never About You","summary":"We’ve all experienced a moment where someone’s behavior catches us completely off guard. Maybe it’s a sudden burst of anger from a coworker, a cutting remark from a family member, or—in my line of work—a patient opening ...","date_modified":"2026-06-18T17:25:50Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/a-witness-to-the-story-on-interdependence-and-secure-love","html_content":"

In just over one month, I will stand before the person I love most in the world and promise her my forever. As the days tick down, friends and acquaintances occasionally ask if the nerves have started to set in yet. They...

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/a-witness-to-the-story-on-interdependence-and-secure-love","title":"A Witness to the Story: On Interdependence and Secure Love","summary":"In just over one month, I will stand before the person I love most in the world and promise her my forever. As the days tick down, friends and acquaintances occasionally ask if the nerves have started to set in yet. They...","date_modified":"2026-06-14T23:52:29Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/finding-solid-ground-in-the-jobs-we-must-keep","html_content":"

There is a quiet weight that almost everyone carries, though we rarely talk about it openly over morning coffee. It’s the heavy, non-negotiable reality of expectations—the structural demand to pay bills, cover rent, take...

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/finding-solid-ground-in-the-jobs-we-must-keep","title":"Finding Solid Ground in the Jobs We Must Keep","summary":"There is a quiet weight that almost everyone carries, though we rarely talk about it openly over morning coffee. It’s the heavy, non-negotiable reality of expectations—the structural demand to pay bills, cover rent, take...","date_modified":"2026-06-10T04:28:24Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/an-exercise-in-radical-humility","html_content":"

We have all been there. You lay out a blueprint for a moment meant to bring joy, comfort, or celebration to someone you deeply care about. You pour your energy, your time, and your best intentions into the mix. In your m...

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/an-exercise-in-radical-humility","title":"An Exercise in Radical Humility","summary":"We have all been there. You lay out a blueprint for a moment meant to bring joy, comfort, or celebration to someone you deeply care about. You pour your energy, your time, and your best intentions into the mix. In your m...","date_modified":"2026-06-07T06:42:39Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/risk-vs-humanity","html_content":"

We talk a lot in healthcare about \"managing risk.\" We write protocols, we check boxes, and we build guardrails to keep people safe. But sometimes, if we aren't careful, those guardrails can turn into a cage.

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/risk-vs-humanity","title":"Risk vs. Humanity","summary":"We talk a lot in healthcare about \"managing risk.\" We write protocols, we check boxes, and we build guardrails to keep people safe. But sometimes, if we aren't careful, those guardrails can turn into a cage.","date_modified":"2026-06-03T03:11:55Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-art-of-holding-space","html_content":"

There is a rare kind of magic that happens when you sit across from someone who has looked profound loss in the eyes, and instead of closing off, decided to build a bigger table.

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-art-of-holding-space","title":"The Art of Holding Space","summary":"There is a rare kind of magic that happens when you sit across from someone who has looked profound loss in the eyes, and instead of closing off, decided to build a bigger table.","date_modified":"2026-06-01T05:09:18Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/how-the-legacy-of-sgt-simone-a-robinson-is-changing-lives","html_content":"

Tragedy has a way of halting time, but for the family of Army Sergeant Simone A. Robinson, it became the catalyst for an enduring cycle of love and community support.Simone was a vibrant 21-year-old from Dixmoor, Illinoi...

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/how-the-legacy-of-sgt-simone-a-robinson-is-changing-lives","title":"How the Legacy of Sgt. Simone A. Robinson is Changing Lives","summary":"Tragedy has a way of halting time, but for the family of Army Sergeant Simone A. Robinson, it became the catalyst for an enduring cycle of love and community support.Simone was a vibrant 21-year-old from Dixmoor, Illinoi...","date_modified":"2026-05-25T14:25:21Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/what-a-95-year-old-hospice-patient-taught-me-about-memory","html_content":"

We tend to think of memory as a filing cabinet—a structured, logical drawer where we store the dates, names, and facts of our lives. When someone faces advanced age or cognitive decline, it can feel like that cabinet is ...

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/what-a-95-year-old-hospice-patient-taught-me-about-memory","title":"What a 95-Year-Old Hospice Patient Taught Me About Memory","summary":"We tend to think of memory as a filing cabinet—a structured, logical drawer where we store the dates, names, and facts of our lives. When someone faces advanced age or cognitive decline, it can feel like that cabinet is ...","date_modified":"2026-05-21T05:43:26Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-beautiful-burden-balancing-love-and-burnout-in-caregiving","html_content":"

There is a profound, often quiet complexity that settles into the room when we care for the people who once cared for us.

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-beautiful-burden-balancing-love-and-burnout-in-caregiving","title":"The Beautiful Burden: Balancing Love and Burnout in Caregiving","summary":"There is a profound, often quiet complexity that settles into the room when we care for the people who once cared for us.","date_modified":"2026-05-19T04:18:19Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-last-mile-finding-dignity-in-the-losses-we-dont-see","html_content":"

By Jesse Bryant Nicety Is Necessity • Reflections from the Field

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-last-mile-finding-dignity-in-the-losses-we-dont-see","title":"The Last Mile: Finding Dignity in the Losses We Don't See","summary":"By Jesse Bryant Nicety Is Necessity • Reflections from the Field","date_modified":"2026-05-16T00:26:23Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-echo-of-the-heart","html_content":"

The Echo of the Heart

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-echo-of-the-heart","title":"The Echo of the Heart","summary":"The Echo of the Heart","date_modified":"2026-05-12T04:30:42Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-armor-of-a-punchline","html_content":"

We’ve all been there. Someone asks how we’re really doing, and instead of opening the door, we throw a flashbang of wit and duck behind the nearest joke.

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-armor-of-a-punchline","title":"The Armor of a Punchline","summary":"We’ve all been there. Someone asks how we’re really doing, and instead of opening the door, we throw a flashbang of wit and duck behind the nearest joke.","date_modified":"2026-05-08T22:42:00Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-light-in-the-room","html_content":"

There’s a specific kind of stillness that lives in the rooms of those who are nearing the end. It’s heavy, but not always sad; it’s more like the air is thick with the importance of everything left unsaid and everything ...

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-light-in-the-room","title":"The Light In the Room","summary":"There’s a specific kind of stillness that lives in the rooms of those who are nearing the end. It’s heavy, but not always sad; it’s more like the air is thick with the importance of everything left unsaid and everything ...","date_modified":"2026-05-06T01:23:23Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-dentists-of-the-soul-when-a-smile-is-more-than-just-teeth","html_content":"

I met a woman today who told me she’d recently visited the dentist. She laughed—a hollow, brittle sound—and asked me, \"Why bother? There’s no reason to fix teeth when you’ve lost your smile.\"

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-dentists-of-the-soul-when-a-smile-is-more-than-just-teeth","title":"The Dentists of the Soul: When a Smile Is More Than Just Teeth","summary":"I met a woman today who told me she’d recently visited the dentist. She laughed—a hollow, brittle sound—and asked me, \"Why bother? There’s no reason to fix teeth when you’ve lost your smile.\"","date_modified":"2026-05-02T05:35:55Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-poetry-of-communication-and-the-grace-of-a-scratch","html_content":"

Today was one of those days that reminds me why I do what I do. I spent time with a patient who doesn't speak in straight lines. She describes her world in the most abstract ways—loops of metaphor and bursts of imagery t...

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/the-poetry-of-communication-and-the-grace-of-a-scratch","title":"The Poetry of Communication and the Grace of a Scratch","summary":"Today was one of those days that reminds me why I do what I do. I spent time with a patient who doesn't speak in straight lines. She describes her world in the most abstract ways—loops of metaphor and bursts of imagery t...","date_modified":"2026-04-29T21:08:17Z"},{"id":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/cultivating-kindness-in-daily-life","html_content":"

The Quiet Power of Everyday Kindness

","url":"https://nicetyisnecessity.com/f/cultivating-kindness-in-daily-life","title":"Cultivating Kindness in Daily Life","summary":"The Quiet Power of Everyday Kindness","date_modified":"2026-04-27T05:22:58Z"}]}